goodbye #1: my apartment

All packed up and ready to turn in the keys :(

If you asked me what my first week in Japan was like back when I arrived in Tokyo in August 2009, I wouldn't be able to describe it at all; it was all a blur, a whirlwind of new information, sights, sounds, and faces. It was as if the fast forward button on the remote control of my life was stuck. My first clear memory of being in Japan was the first night I spent alone in my apartment, after the craziness of orientations had subsided. I sat there on my living room floor in sort of a daze, blankly staring at my opened suitcase, listening to the crickets chirping outside my window. My family had each written a letter and hid it in my suitcase; letters filled with memories, encouraging words, advice, and prayers. It was enough to get the waterworks running.

Oh my gosh, what the heck have I done? There's no going back now. Oh my gosh, where the heck am I? Oh my gosh...oh my gosh.

Enter 2-inch, black cockroach. (I think they make it a tradition to welcome the new ALT to their new home on their first night in Oshima.) As I screamed and climbed to the highest peak of the apartment (my couch) analyzing the situation and my distance from said cockroach, reality hit me like a ton of bricks. For as long as I lived in Japan, I was on my own. Washing dishes, doing laundry, buying food, cooking the food, paying bills, and yes...killing bugs...I was going to be responsible for everything. EVERYTHING.

Fast forward two years, and there I was again, sitting on my living room floor, packing my last remaining suitcase for the trip home. The last of the boxes had been packed and shipped. My closets and drawers had been cleaned out and a bleach/windex smell lingered throughout the apartment. I checked and double-checked that every possible area had been cleaned. I looked out my window one last time. I closed my eyes and envisioned past shadows of cooking my first (and unsuccessful) batch of frozen gyoza on rice my first night, successfully capturing an enormous spider from my living room and setting it free outside (while yelling, "I saved your life! Don't you ever come back! And tell your friends to stay out too!"), huddling in front of my heater as I changed my clothes for work in the freezing winter mornings, and setting down bedding for the many friends who came for an Oshima sleepover.

This had been my first experience living on my own. This was my first apartment. This is where I learned independence.

my kids :)

I want to write about how amazing my kids are. I have over 600 of them and each one is special. Each one has a personality, a story, a favorite hobby, and a food that they despise. Some are super energetic, others sleep during class. Some are tall and sporty while others prefer to chill in the music room during lunch recess. Getting to know all of these different personalities and life stories has been such a blessing during my time here in Japan.

I've made connections with a number of students here; I've watched them grow up right before my eyes. The cute little 4th graders in elementary school that I met when I first came to Japan two years ago are now the "big dogs" on campus. My original elementary 6th graders are now 2nd graders in junior high school. And finally, the little 1st graders in junior high school are now the kings and queens of the school, the almighty 3rd graders. I can hardly wrap my head around everything.

Saying goodbye to these many schools that I've seen grow and change, fill and empty, has been quite the emotional roller coaster. It all had to end someday. For me, the realization that it IS ending, came as a bit of a shock. The end came out of nowhere. And yet, here I am, saying goodbye to the very kids who welcomed me to Oshima on my first day on the job.

I wanted to write about how amazing my kids are, but rather, I'll show you.

I came home one night to find these handpicked flowers outside my apartment door. They were from one of my JHS 1st graders, Hinata. The next day, I went to her school for the last time. After class, I asked her when she came to my place. She stopped to think and then replied, "At 7:00pm. And then at 8:30pm." Poor girl came twice just in case I was home :( That really touched me.

After a class of rushed interview tests, I came into the class to find the chalkboard filled with messages and pictures for me. The JHS 2nd graders had been working on it the entire 50-min period while I was out. An amazing class, one of my favorites :)

Yuta is a JHS 2nd grade boy who loves English and making the class laugh. I was so touched to receive a letter from him on my last day at his school. An awesome kid indeed.

This card just about sums up my feelings right at this very second. A JHS 2nd grade girl, Suzuka, whom I had become friends with during the Suo-oshima English camp back in August, had written a letter for me. She is one of the bubbliest people I know. I will miss her terribly.

a place to think

This is my thinking place. I picked it because (1) it reminded me of the final scene of "Free Willy", (2) it is about a 10 min walk from my apartment alongside a beautiful beach called 'Katazoegahama', and (3) it is the most serene and magical of all places in Japan. I often stop here to think during my weekly (sometimes bimonthly) running routine. I've done some pretty good thinking here, too. On some days, I would try to figure out just how I came to be here on this tiny island of Suo-oshima. I'd think about the future. When I was homesick I would think about my family and friends back home. At the end of my first year in JET, I would stare out at sea and wonder how I would last another year without my friends who had just left.

Today, I gazed at the late-afternoon scenery as a video montage played in my head. I sat there, breeze to my back, and reminisced about the past 2 years in JET. It's almost over. I can't believe it's almost here. Starting tomorrow, I will be visiting schools for the very last time. Every week, from now until I leave Japan, there will be at least one goodbye. I'm not good with goodbyes, as cliche as that may sound. The thought of saying goodbye to a group of people that I may never see again makes my heart drop.

I needed today to mentally prepare myself for such upcoming events. I sat there at my thinking spot, pondered if a killer whale really could jump over the dock, and smiled. I had found my peace. The past 2 years here in Suo-oshima really have been nothing short of amazing :)

the shishamo CHALLENGE!!!

School lunch in Japan has always been quite the adventure for me. I've seen it all: dried squid head, natto, fried blowfish, iriko (tiny fish they put in the salad)...the list goes on. I'm sad to say I've probably eaten whale meat too without knowing it. (I don't usually ask about what I'm eating. I just down the hatch.)

I've never been much of a seafood eater. Back home, the only seafood I touched was shrimp, crab, fish sticks, and kamaboko (the pink & white stuff in bentos and saimin.) I NEVER ate fish. NEVER. My family is more of a chicken-eating clan ;) That being said, to be able to say that I now eat sashimi, sushi, and the previously stated seafood dishes is quite an accomplishment for me.

Today during school lunch, the unimaginable (for me) appeared. *dun dun dun* SHISHAMO. It wasn't the first time I've met this aquatic opponent. I had been served many of his relatives at other schools over the past 2 years here in Japan. Usually, I would swiftly hand it off to a hungry-looking boy next to me without anyone noticing. Today, however, I had no opportunity as I was seated in the front of the class, with everyone...EVERYONE...watching me.

It was time for the SHISHAMO CHALLENGE!!!

Alongside the shishamo was a bowl of rice, a small plate of crunchy spinach, a banana, a bottle of milk, and a bowl of soup filled with mushrooms, carrots, and fish meatballs.

I looked at him. He stared back at me. "All?" I asked a student as I scanned my finger from his tail to his mouth. The boy nodded with a smile. "Delicious?" Another happy nod. The other kids were just chowing down on the meal as if it were a slice of pizza. I've never been a big fan of eating things that were staring back at me. His mouth open, as if calling out to me saying "Please don't eat me Tiffany sensei!"

After about a 5 min mental battle with myself, I proceeded to the first bite. I could feel the texture of his open mouth on my tongue so I quickly added some rice. I looked down on my plate and realized that the fish's stomach was FILLED WITH EGGS! It wasn't a HE afterall! It was a SHE!

My stomach began to churn and I could feel my gag reflex kicking in. No Tiff, you can't throw up here! Don't do it! That would not be good! Just chew....chew...chew...chew...think about something else...oh, cute! That kid has a Pokemon pencil case!...chew...chew...chew...

With the aid of some milk and soup, I eventually got the entire fish (head and all!) down. Although I finished the entire meal about 10 min after everyone else, I was able to claim victory over the shishamo challenge. Never again folks...never again. Praise the Lord there was only one ;)

congrats young skywalker!

I was given the amazing opportunity to return to Hawaii for just 5 days and see my brother graduate from the University of Hawaii. I'm so very proud of him :) He's worked so hard on his bachelor degree; hours and hours of studying, writing up papers, undertaking internships, all while having a part time job and fulfilling scholarship obligations. Did you know he had over a 3.8 GPA!? That trumps mine for sure! A brilliant young man with a bright future ahead of him, an incredible computer and video game expert, and the greatest brother I could ever ask for. CONGRATS LUKE!!! :D

sapporo revisited

Meet Shimo (means "frosty" in Japanese), my very first snowman! :)

Nestled in the cold winter weeks of Japan is a wonderful 3-day holiday, perfectly situated as to let people visit Sapporo for the annual Snow Festival. I had been looking forward to this weekend for quite some time, ever since the previous year’s trip. Hostels were reserved in November, plane tickets were booked in December, and plans were finalized months before the actual event. Sapporo, here we come ;)

For me, February in Yamaguchi was spent curled up in front of a heater cursing the essence of winter while movies like Blue Crush and Lilo and Stitch played in the background. Fast-forward to our Sapporo trip, where thousands of people joined together in celebrating the beauty and wonderment of winter. A very different spirit indeed.

Who knew cold could be so much fun? At the many festival sites were assortments of ice sculptures resembling that of beloved cartoon characters and famous buildings. We also tried our hand at snow tubing –a not-so-popular pastime in Hawaii ;) There was even a snowman building booth at one of the snow sites, where I aided the Canadian in the construction of my very first legitimate snowman. His name came to be Shimo (“shimo” means “snowball” in Japanese). The Canadian was pleased :)

There was so much fun to be had. A dinner buffet every night (the first being crab, the second being mutton), snowboarding at the magnificent Teine Ski Resort, a trip to the Sapporo Beer Museum (well…to the tasting section at least), soup curry with friends, and the most amazing display of snow and ice artwork I have ever seen…an amazing time indeed.

a wake-up call

It's been a relaxing couple of weeks here in Yamaguchi. Between March and April, time goes into a sort of limbo: the school year ends and a new one awaits, teachers are shuffled and reassigned to different schools throughout the prefecture, and winter slowly fades into spring. I've found myself relaxing at home, watching movies, and saving up for the vacations to follow in May.

In the spirit of money-saving, Kyle and a Japanese friend of ours decided to go out for bowling and drinks Saturday night. Bowling was a great success, 1,050 yen (about $12) for 3 games. I racked up a whopping 144 points...my total of the 3 games :P Feeling good and realizing it was only 10:30pm, we head to a favorite bar spot in Kudamatsu. The bar is a small, intimate 15-person space, where customers sit together on 2 benches cornering the bartending area. Customers will sit and drink together as ABBA soundtracks and cigarette smoke fill the air.

The perfect setting for a relaxing Satuday night, right?

The only problem with having such an intimate setting is when all the people just don't fit right. My friend is Japanese-born and raised-but moved to Europe for many years. His English is amazing. After hearing our English conversations, one of the drunken barmates kept asking him things like, "Are you really Japanese?" and "You're not Japanese! Where are you from?" I began to wonder if things like that bothered him. To be told such a thing. The drunken barmate continued his interrogation, asking him where he worked. I coud tell he was uncomfortable and quickly stepped in to change the subject.

We were just about to leave when the drunken barmate offered to buy us drinks. In Japan it's considered an insult if you refuse someone's offer, and since the man was clearly drunk, we stayed for one more. Finally, the drunken barmate's friend walks in and sits down. He notices Kyle, as his friend pushes him to speak the English he knows.

And then, the wake-up call. He says in Japanese, "We're in Japan, (I order you to) speak Japanese!" He's clearly speaking to Kyle, as I'm always assumed to be a local. The thing is, I'm just as foreign in Japan as Kyle is. I can't speak fluent Japanese. I don't know all of the Japanese customs. I'm not Japanese. What the man had said really bothered me, so much that I couldn't stop thinking about it all the way home. We're in Japan, (I order you to) speak Japanese! Those words rocked me to my core. It was the ugliest thing I had ever heard in my life. Are there really people who still think like this? There was nothing I could do about it. Even if I had wanted to give him a piece of my mind, I couldn't; one, because my Japanese language skills aren't good enough and two, because it wouldn't have change anything.

It was truly a wake-up call for me, that hate exists in the world. All I can do is positively influence the future generation of Japan, one student at a time.

safe in the Guch

Praise the Lord I am fortunate enough to begin this blog with such a title. First and foremost, I want to reassure everyone back home that I am safe and sound here in Japan. Your emails and facebook messages were truly touching as I could feel your concern and prayers from thousands of miles away. I am so very blessed to have people like you in my life who love and care for me.

Again, blessed by God, I was far from the chaos and destruction caused by the earthquake and tsunami. Here's a map made by my friend Brandon to help better clarify my whereabouts.

Being so far away from everything, it almost feels as if nothing has happened. Construction workers were still out early Saturday morning, building up a new set of houses; families were out to the malls and grocery stores of Yamaguchi. Honestly, if I hadn't been at the BOE on Friday afternoon, I probably wouldn't have even known there was such a tragedy. I recall my boss getting a phone call at around 4pm on Friday, March 11, 2011, and then frantically barking orders to my supervisor and other office mates. Before you knew it, everyone was running around every which way, calling up the different schools to let them know the news while at the same time dialing up their loved ones on their personal cell phones to make sure they were alive and well. Then came the haunting sounds of the sirens which echoed throughout the streets and a direct announcement completely in Japanese. It felt like we were in a war. I had no clue what the announcement was saying but followed everyone downstairs where a TV displayed the unbelievable footage from the tsunami.

As of right now, it is believed that over 10,000 people have been killed. Many people are missing and many more are being found dead on the northeastern shores of Japan. The earthquake is said to have measured 8.9M, the greatest magnitude ever recorded in Japan (in comparison, the Great Hanshin earthquake of 1995 measured 6.8M), and the tsunami about 10 m high (33 ft). There's already a wikipedia article entitled the 2011 Sendai earthquake and tsunami. Hundreds of thousands of people are without food, water, and shelter, all the while searching for loved ones.

Praise the Lord all my friends are safe and accounted for. Two of my friends were at Tokyo Disneyland together during the earthquake. They were kept overnight in the park and had to sleep in a restaurant relying on cardboard boxes and garbage bags as bedding. They've since returned to Yamaguchi and are safe.

It's crazy to think that that earthquake/tsunami could have hit anywhere. I could have been teaching a class and pondering my dinner plans one moment, and then be gone the next. It's times like these that remind me that every day is a precious gift from God.


Please keep the people of Japan in your prayers.


Before-after shots of the Tohoku region of Japan:
http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2011/03/13/world/asia/satellite-photos-japan-before-and-after-tsunami.html

American Red Cross relief efforts for those who want to help:
http://www.redcross.org/

サザンセトロードレース (Sazan Seto Road Race)...CHALLENGE #2!!! :D

Brandon, Michelle, me, and Choruru - Yamaguchi's mascot - before the race.

The day had finally come. Exactly one year ago I had found myself in the same predicament: running 21.097 km in under 2 hours 10 min for the half marathon portion of the Sazan Seto Road Race here in Suo-oshima, Yamaguchi, Japan (my hometown). My BOE had made me a special T-shirt with everyone's signatures. I was pumped and ready to fulfill the dream I had set for myself one year ago as I crossed the finish line 2 min after the allotted time. I was not to be defeated this time.

5 min to race time. I lace up my shoes. I take time for one last stretch. I tighten my ponytail. I am set. Cue Eminem on the iPod. I soak up his words like a sponge. If you had, one shot, one opportunity, to seize everything you ever wanted, one moment...would you capture it? Or just let it slip?

Bass pounding, the gun sounds, and we're off. This year I had a new strategy to ensure my success, 10-1-10, which is where you run 10 min, walk 1 min, and continue to do so throughout the race. It made sense. During the 10 min run, you would be using different muscles than the 1 min walk. I could give certain muscles a rest, thereby allowing me to run more efficiently with less fatigued muscles. Gold.

Gosh there sure are a lot of old people running this. One by one, participants donning orange 'Hiroshima Senior Citizen Club' jerseys pass by. I push myself and continue to run according to the 10-1-10 strategy. At first it takes me a while to adjust to the time-keeping with my stopwatch but finally get the hang of it at around the 6 km mark. Time passes and the 10 km mark is in sight. Oh the 10 km mark. I look down at my stopwatch. A little under 60 min had already passed. Perfect. Or so I thought. In order for me to finish within 2 hours 10 min, I would have to run 10 min miles. I naively assumed that I had ran 10 MILES (in accordance with 10 km), and would finish the race with time to spare. I had calculated wrong. At that point, I had ran a little under 6 miles. The clock was ticking.

I pass by a group of grandmas and grandpas that had lined the sidewalks to cheer. Gambare! Makenaide! they shout, waving their little Japanese flags and clapping. I flash them a winner's smile and continue on. Oh thank God! The turn around point! A big, orange cone welcomes me to my reality. Wha...!? I realize my amateur mistake. 50 min to run the remaining 10 km. It was do-able...for Olympians...but for me...hmm...I begin to panic.

Oh gosh, I'm going to let everyone down. All the people at the BOE! And my friends who came to cheer me on. Focus. Focus, Tiff. It's not over till it's over. Given that I had been running for a little over an hour, I felt pretty good. My legs weren't yet burning and I felt like there was enough "gas in the tank" to make it back to the 2nd water station. Run like the wind, Tiff! 10-1-10. Stick to the plan. I make it to the water station and grab a cup from an elementary school kid. I hear him say (w/English translation), "Hey! I know her! She's my English teacher! Hang in there!" That がんばれ was all I needed to pick up the pace. Here we go.

I begin blogging in my head as I look off into the beautiful Seto Inland Sea. I wonder if at the end of this blog entry, I'll have a picture of me jumping for joy as I cross the finish line or passed out on the ground defeated? Focus Tiff! Left leg...right leg...left...right...just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I make many analogies between running and my JET experience; getting through hard days, enduring and overcoming challenges to become a stronger person, all the while keeping up with my 10-1-10 strategy.

I glance at my watch and take time to do correct math. 30 min left with 6 km to go. Things began to look grim. Doubt started to set in. Fatigue. Disappointment. Pretty much everything and anything that you would find in a goodie bag from the devil himself began to trickle in. I see a runner pass me by, #508. We had been playing tag the entire race. As much as I wanted to leave her in my dust, I did hold her in the highest respect. She appeared to be in her 60s afterall. Yes, my pacing buddy was a 60+ year old lady, no shame in that. We run together, up the last remaining mountain, through the last remaining fishing town. Every second that passed by brought me closer and closer to defeat. I was exhausted at this point. 10 min was all that remained for me to finish 2 km. It was not going to happen. The 10-1-10 system began to break down. I found myself starting a new method, the 5-1-run-whenever-you-can-feel-your-legs-again method. I can assure you you won't find that one in many running magazines :P

I'll have you know that I finished. I managed to escape the First Aid bus that picks up people who seem like they've had enough. I ran my little heart out till the end, passing #508, and ending on a high note "sprint" (I'd call it more of a "flying wobble.") A part of me was disappointed that I hadn't finished in time and another part of me was content that I hadn't given up. I pondered the meaning of the day as I waited for my friends at the finish line. Suddenly I hear, "Tiffany-sensei!" I turn and see a group of elementary school kids that I often teach. They had come to cheer on their classmates in the 5 km race. And then, the meaning of the day, the resolution, became clear. When I leave Japan, no one is going to remember my race time or that I didn't finish in time. The important thing is the friendships: the friendships that led my BOE to make me such an amazing T-shirt, the friendships with the teachers and kids who passed out water and cheered me on, the friendships that were waiting for me at the finish line. My impression on the people that I will soon say goodbye to is what's truly important. As much as I'd love to post pictures of me victoriously crossing the finish line here at the end of this blog, I'm just as happy to end it with these :)

Kyle and me :)

Yamaguchi JETs represent! (L to R: Brandon, Kyle, Steff, me, Christina, and Michelle) Photo courtesy of Steff Y :)

 

My awesome T-shirt signed by my BOE coworkers.

Thanks Nakamura, you were right! :D

Hawaii Take 2

Dad, me, and Mom performing a Christmas tradition: Christmas lights!

  

Golly wolly I can't believe I haven't touched this thing since Nov 25, 2010! It's an entirely different year now! 2011! Something tells me it's going to be a great year ;) I apologize to all 10 of my readers :) Sadly enough, my 1.5 year old laptop BROKE so I'm in the process of buying another one. Until then I'm forced to rely on the computer at my BOE between the hours of 8:30 and 4:30. Outside of that, I've been reading, putting together a Totoro jigsaw puzzle, and watching HOURS of TV. A tech-cleansing experience indeed.

Since my Nagasaki adventures in November 2010, I visited my island home of Hawaii for a second time since coming to Japan with JET. It was an entirely different experience I found to be back home. I was there for 3 weeks (3 WEEKS!) from Dec 18 - Jan 9. I had an incredible time seeing family and friends, going to favorite hang out spots and eateries, appreciating the warm Hawaii weather and cool trade winds, and of course...driving on the right side of the road ;) It was my first Christmas back since being on JET. Last Christmas was tough on me, what with the absence of a true Christmas celebration, SUPER cold weather, and even shorter days (I remember the sun setting at around 4:30pm!). Worst of all, Japan has no Christmas holiday, so I found myself surfing the internet on Christmas Day at my desk at the BOE. Definitely not recommended :(

Aside from all the negativity that I was feeling that year, I did take to heart the true meaning of Christmas: spending the holiday season together with cherished family and friends. That's all I really wanted. When you take away the tall Christmas tree, shopping extravaganzas, and present wrapping, it was really the traditions with loved ones that I really missed; baking Christmas cookies w/my mom, watching old Christmas specials that were tapped on VHS, going to see the Christmas lights in Pauoa and on King St., and going to Christmas Eve service with the family. It truly was an amazing Christmas :)


The Yoshida family in front of the Christmas tree on Christmas Day...as it should be :)

I caught up with lots of friends and got to hit up a lot of local restaurants including Shokudo, Zippys, Banana Leaf (good osusume Steph!), Manoa Sandwich Shop, Tsukijis, and Kaka'ako Kitchen. DELICIOUS! Activities included hiking, karaoke, pizza day with Luke (Papa Johns FTW!), the Palafox Christmas party, and pyromania with the Tabios/Shiroma families on New Years Eve.

The CAS group at karaoke :P

Some friends from Japan were also visiting, so it was nice to take them around. One of the head teachers I taught with last year visited with his family. We took them surfing for the first time at Waikiki Beach (his son even stood up and caught a wave! AMAZING!) and had dinner at Buca di Beppo. Afterwards, we took them to D&B. The kids had an awesome time and were really liking the ticket redemption idea. (In Japan, most of the toys are won through the crane games. I've rarely seen a ticket redemption station.)

Mr. Ueda and me at Buca di Beppo. Look at all that delicious food!

One of the principals from my elementary schools also visited with his wife. We went for dessert at Big City Diner. They were impressed with the size of the desserts (and coffee)! It was really nice to see them, especially since they were wearing aloha shirts (which they had bought that day!). I usually see him in a full suit at work!

The Nakamuras sporting their おしゃれ aloha shirts.

Another highlight was our short visit to Hilo to see my grandma and grandpa. My dad and me went for 2 days and 1 night. It was really nice to see the Yoshida family and spend time with grandma and grandpa. I was glad to see they were doing good. Very げんき :) Since I moved to Japan and they moved to Hilo (a different island from where I live), I've become even more appreciative of each second I have to spend with them. I can't wait to see them again in May for Luke's graduation.

Gma and Gpa Yoshida :)

Being away from Hawaii (and having to endure the evil winters here in Japan), my love for the Islands has grown that much more. To call a place like Hawaii home is something truly special, in a way that I cannot adequately describe through this blog post. (Although I'm sure any place you can call home is equally as special.) The funny thing is, I consider Yamaguchi, Japan my home as well. I guess the saying rings true: home is where the heart is.